


Dear Mom

by StopIWantToTalkAboutCheese



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Character Study, Introspection, Sort Of, especially since they almost never interact, idk i just think their relationship in s1 was cool, other characters are mentioned but not really in it, this is just. clarke's pov of season 1 and part of season 2
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-09
Updated: 2020-11-09
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:08:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,079
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27463201
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StopIWantToTalkAboutCheese/pseuds/StopIWantToTalkAboutCheese
Summary: Clarke writes letters to her mother throughout her first few weeks on the ground.
Relationships: Abby Griffin & Clarke Griffin
Kudos: 4





	Dear Mom

Dear Mom,

I know you’ll never see this. I don’t even know why I’m writing this. Comfort, I guess. I can burn it later, it’ll make good tinder.

That’s right. Tinder. Because we can start fires now. We never could on the Ark, but here, we can just… light things up. 

Earth is incredible.

We landed just a few minutes ago. Everything’s so amazing here. The dirt, the trees, the smells, the _color…_

The trees are green, and they’re nothing like the little one we have on the Ark, or even the algae farms. They’re tall, and the way the sunlight filters through them… Mom, for the first time in my life, I can hear _birds._ And the sky… 

The sky is so blue, Mom. It’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.

I can’t believe it– we’re on Earth. And we’re _surviving._

There’s a few problems, though– you’ve probably noticed them by now. One, you guys dropped us on the wrong damn mountain. Thanks for that.

And two– our communications are out. Dead. Which isn’t good at all. 

We’re heading to Mount Weather to find supplies. I think we’ll be able to make it before nightfall. Hopefully, there’ll be a radio there.

May we meet again.

* * *

Dear Mom,

You know what’s weird? Talking to people. It’s really weird to talk to people. I guess after you’ve been in solitary for a year, anything can amaze you.

But it feels _so good,_ Mom. So good. To speak, and to get a response. I keep trying to hide it, especially because we have way bigger things to worry about.

But I love it.

* * *

Dear Mom,

I don’t even know where to start.

Well, I guess we never made it to Mount Weather.

Because there are people down here. People, who have survived down here for the last ninety seven years. I mean, we were excited to see a deer. But now there’s _people_.

But now… 

One of them hurt Jasper. Maybe killed him. We don’t know.

He’s gone. Physically gone. They moved him, and we don’t know where.

It was so carefully executed. I think they could kill us all if they wanted to.

We might all already be dead.

* * *

Dear Mom,

We found Jasper. He was tied to a tree. Somebody left him there.

He’s dying, Mom.

What do I do?

* * *

Dear Mom,

Bellamy is starting to scare me. He’s forcing people to take off their wristbands in exchange for food.

The wristbands are our only way to communicate. They’re _your_ only way to survive. If we don’t keep them on, everyone on the Ark could die.

But I don’t think I can stop him.

* * *

Mom,

I found out.

Why?

* * *

Why?

* * *

Why?

* * *

Why?

* * *

Dear Mom,

Wells is dead.

* * *

Dear Mom,

We banished Murphy. Charlotte is dead, too. She murdered Wells.

This is all my fault.

* * *

Dear Mom,

We found Raven. 

But Bellamy broke the radio.

We’re going to try to let you know we’re alive. If it works, nobody else will have to die. Please, don’t go through with the culling. Convince Kane and Jaha.

Please.

* * *

Dear Mom,

We just can’t catch a break. But I have some down time now, so here I am.

I don’t know why I’m writing to you again. I can talk to you now, on the radio. 

But I don’t want to talk. I don’t want to hear your excuses about what happened to Dad. 

I just need to… to vent, I guess. To get it out. 

Finn’s been stabbed, but you knew that. What you don’t know is that the blade was poisoned. And I don’t think I’m ever going to tell you that, because then you’d ask how we fixed it.

I don’t think you’d ever look at me the same way ever again.

~~And I can’t~~

~~You got Dad killed. You got me arrested and sent to Earth. You can’t judge~~

I’m sorry.

* * *

Dear Mom,

I saw the dropship.

I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.

Please come back. I’m sorry.

I love you.

* * *

Dear Mom,

I can’t save everyone. I couldn’t save Tris. I couldn’t save you. And now Finn might be dead, too. 

I never thought I’d say this, but I miss the Ark. I miss you. I miss Dad. I miss Wells.

I know this sounds childish, but God, Mom, _I want to go home._

* * *

Dear Mom,

I’m so tired.

* * *

Dear Mom,

We have a plan. 

If I do it, three hundred people will die. 

But if I don’t, _we_ will die.

~~Why can’t I~~

I have to go. Anya is coming.

We need to be ready.

* * *

Dear Mom,

Long story short, we made it to Mount Weather. Finally.

I can’t write anything down– I’m too afraid of what they might see. But I can think. And I guess I’m thinking at you. About you. Whatever.

I don’t even know if you’re alive, or if Bellamy and Finn survived, or– anything, really. It’s so frustrating, and so lonely. Nobody is telling me anything, and they’re not even letting me go look for you. I don’t understand why. I would only be risking my own life, and I can survive out there.

I have before.

I can do it again.

But _they keep stopping me._ Why?

I have to find out.

* * *

Dear Mom,

It’s too good to be true. I know that sounds good, but… it really is _too good to be true._

Something is wrong. I know it.

I have to investigate.

I have an idea that I want to try. Hopefully I don’t get floated for it. Or whatever the equivalent is down here.

* * *

Dear Mom,

I was right not to trust them. I was right to be afraid.

We haven’t been saved. We’ve been marked for slaughter.

We aren’t in Heaven on Earth.

We’re in hell.

* * *

Dear Mom,

Anya and I escaped. After some– disagreement, and fighting, and… well, it doesn’t really matter anymore. Besides, I’m pretty sure that soon, I can just tell you all of this in person.

We’ve come to an agreement– we’re going to try to save all of our people from Mount Weather. _Everyone–_ that means Grounders _and_ the rest of the 100. She’s going to try to talk to the Grounder commander, and I’ll try to talk to the Chancellor. Hope Jaha’s in the mood to negotiate with a traitor and some aliens.

So… I think I’m going to find you again soon.

* * *

Dear Mom,

I see you.

**Author's Note:**

> What did you think?  
> :)


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